By Heather Sohl
Bullying has become a serious issue. As a mother, I always ask my kids how their day was. Did anything interesting happen within their day, good, bad or indifferent. By doing that, I found out that one of my kids was cuffed upside the back of his head, called an idiot, and told that he sucks by a boy who just didn’t want him to be friends with kids with whom he wanted to be friends. This situation my seem slight, but it still effected my son.
There are three types of bullying: verbal, social and physical. Sadly,
it doesn’t even just happen to kids. Adults experience it too!
But why?
There are people, kids and adults, that are trying to fit into a crowd, social acceptance. We all have insecurities, but some feel the need to assert themselves in a more aggressive manner. In the social media realm, there is cyber bullying. People make posts not thinking about the possible future consequences. Next thing you know, there is an embarrassing photo being re-posted by someone unhappy with you, and it has an effect upon your future …cyberbullying.
But why?
There may be a lack of attention at home. There may be aggression in the home. They may have their own physical or mental insecurities, so they exert power to lift themselves up.
What are the signs?
There is no romanticizing this subject, but I immediately think about the movie “The Breakfast Club”. The character John Bender, the perceived “bad boy”, is the staple example of a bully; however, in today’s society, there is such a personal disconnect. It can be anyone.
A person being bullied may be hesitant to tell someone what is happening. They feel a sense of shame or are afraid that telling will make the situation worse. They tend to make excuses not to go to school or not to go to work. The quality of homework/work may decline.
What can we do?
I think a really prevalent saying right now is “see something, say something”. There is so much going on in this world today. It is so important to make sure there are open lines of communication within the household. Know there is support everywhere. There are online resources that can be utilized. If you are a member of a church group, there are people within to give guidance.
I like to read this to my boys before their games:
“No one can destroy iron, but it’s own rust can, like no one can destroy a person, but his own mindset can.” – Author unknown